No one thought the post apocalyptic world would look like this. Films and books had always portrayed a world ruled by martial law where survivors live in fear of barbarians. Fire barrels. Deserted highways. Lots of leather for some reason. No one could have predicted the fate that really came to be: A WORLD RUN BY CATS! No one expected that these cuddly little creatures would turn on us so violently. They tore down our monuments, imprisoned those who defied them and burned all of our art and literature to the ground. They took our dignity and destroyed our history. I live a very humble life with my female companion here on the island of what was once known as manhattan (I have no idea if I’m pronouncing that correctly). But we are not alone. Two felines occupy our living quarters with an iron fist. We are forced to clean up their excrement from a small rectangle of sand. We must feed them whenever they beckon. They dictate where my feet should be as I sleep. But the most terrifying part is this: On most evenings they just lay strewn across the floor in a most erotic way, just glaring at us. It’s as if, just by living, we have somehow disappointed them. Perhaps they are just amused by how easy it was to domesticate us.
If this message is successful in making it backwards in time, then remember this one thing: Spay and neuter your cats. Please, the human race is depending on you. This is not a joke. This is our future.