HARDY! I want Hugh Hardy in my office now! What kind of reporter are you, Hugh? Did you even see what just happened outside? Powers-Man just saved a bus full of people from crashing into a trolley and you missed the whole damn thing! Wake up, Hardy! Why is it that every time Powers-Man shows up, you mysteriously disappear? Are you afraid of actually getting a scoop? Is it drugs? Honestly if it is, now is the time to tell me. We can get you help. Well, where the hell do you go all the time? What? You thought it was hot out today so you went to the ice cream parlor?! You are some piece of work. I betcha vanilla is your favorite flavor, huh Hardy? My god, you are the complete opposite of Powers-Man in every way imaginable! You have zero social skills and are a complete coward whereas Powers-Man is incredibly charismatic and very brave. God bless you Powers-Man, where ever you are.
Then again, I’ve never noticed it before but you two actually share similar builds along with an intense sense of justice. In fact the two of you seem-Damn it Hardy, how did you manage to get your foot stuck in that paint can again!? Watch out, your pant leg is on fire! Not the fish tank! Wow Hardy, you’re clumsiness is in direct proportion to Powers-Man’s courage. You better go clean yourself up and get started on this bus story. I only wish Powers-Man were here with me now so I could thank him for all the times he’s saved this fair city. What do you mean “maybe I already have”? Tell me four eyes, when have I thanked Powers-Man? Huh? I’ve never met the man. Why are you always talking so incredulously? Whenever I say something like “And we owe it all to Powers-Man” you always do this thing where you’re smirking at nobody. It’s creepy. I don’t like it. Speaking of creepy, I don’t want to catch you putting your pants on in the supply closet again. I don’t know what you’re doing in there but it needs to stop.