How To Dismantle An Atomic Steve

I won a contest today!  Can you believe it?  I never win anything (well, unless you count winning the lottery for the last six consecutive years. I own eight boats and they’re all named SERPICO).  Here’s the deal, my friend Alex is a huge U2 fan.  He knows everything about them and owns all their albums (except their old stuff, he only likes the stuff from 2000’s).  He’s even in a U2 tribute band called “Me2” where he plays the guitar and plays the part of the lead singer, Bondo. Anyways, U2 was having a big contest and Alex entered it.  He jokingly said I should enter too (actually he said “Steve, U2 should enter.” Get it?  This guy’s the best). So I just went for it and guess what? I won!  Not only did I win a chance to meet all of the guys in the band, but I also get to join the band forever!  That means I’ll be in the studio for the recording of their (our) new album and I’ll be going on their (our) next world tour.  I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO PLAY ANY INSTRUMENTS!  I’m kind of freaking out, but I’m sure I’ll pick it up along the way. Maybe I’ll play the sax and give U2 some third wave ska flavor. RUDEBOY! I’d ask Alex to teach me how to play all the U2 songs but unfortunately he killed himself after he heard I’d won the contest.  The guys in the band all have a pretty good sense of humor.  Last night I said “The Edge, more like the Edge of Insanity.” Me, Bonzo, and Michael Clayton laughed for a while after that one.  The Edge just silently smiled for a long time and then threw his guitar at me.  Being in a band is so much fun! See U on tour! love, Steve

U2

Imagine me jamming out with these dudes.  BOOSH! DISCOTEQUE!

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One response to “How To Dismantle An Atomic Steve

  1. Steve,
    I was at the grocery store today and over the intercom the manger said “Steve, you have a phone call line 2.” That went on for three minutes and you did not even answer you manager or the phone call. Way to be rude Steve, now a manager at a supermarket has no idea where Steve is and someone called for Steve.

    Hey Nate

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